So why are so few people truly happy?
With their lives, with their jobs, in their relationships, with themselves?
When I look around, I see so much unhappiness.
So many people seem to be so miserable, living lives that are not fulfilling.
You can see it in the eyes, if you really look.
But being happy is actually quite simple.
We are the ones who make it difficult.
Because we are conditioned to do the exact opposite of the things we really need to do to be happy.
Most of us are looking for happiness in all the wrong places, so to speak.
We are conditioned to respond to our fears and look for comfort and security, rather than connect with the deepest, truest part of ourselves and discover happiness.
Let’s take a leap and make ourselves happy, shall we?
This post is the first in a three part series on “How to be Happy”.
This is a big topic and there is a lot of conditioning that we need to re-consider so that we can stop waiting for happiness to come to us, and we can start making ourselves happy.
Step 1: Connect with your heart
The heart has an intelligence all it’s own.
Unfortunately, in our society we are rewarded for developing the intelligence in our heads (in school and then in our jobs), but the intelligence in our hearts is not cultivated or respected.
But the intelligence of the heart is what best leads us to happiness. And ignoring the deepest desires of the heart is a sure route to misery.
So what can you do about this?
You need to re-establish the connection to your heart.
You can do this by sitting down quietly for 5 minutes a day and sending your attention down into the heart. Just stay quiet and listen.
Maybe ask your heart if it has something to say to you. You can put your hand on your heart if it helps you to connect. Keep your mind quiet, and eventually, you will hear something.
(And you’re not going crazy. The heart has a different intelligence.)
But, for many of us who have been hurt earlier in life, opening our hearts may be difficult because painful experiences in the past made us unconsciously “shut down”, closing our hearts to emotion.
Sometimes, in the process of opening our hearts, we might even re-experience the original emotions that forced us to shut down in the first place.
However, just like an intense light might be painful if a blind person were to immediately gain the ability to see, or sounds may seem extremely loud for a deaf person who instantly gained the ability to hear, the pain that we may experience as the heart begins to re-awaken is the pain of a new sense organ coming alive.
When I regained my connection to my own heart, I realized that I hadn’t been truly alive without it.
A connection to your heart is essential for true happiness.
Step 2: Follow your true passion and purpose in life
Living a life of meaning, passion, and purpose is another important aspect of being happy.
Who wants to live life when their actions don’t really mean anything?
In fact, I found that when I took jobs that I thought had no real meaning or purpose other than a paycheck, I found that I was becoming more and more disconnected from my heart– and myself.
You know that you can only put your heart into things that you love or that mean a lot to you.
So what are you doing the rest of the time?
Just going through the motions?
Happiness requires doing more things that are aligned to your true purpose and passion in life.
And doing as little as possible that goes against the values of your heart.
Have you ever felt yourself pushing yourself to do something that you felt your heart was against? How hard was it to do? Doing things in that way wastes so much energy, and leaves us exhausted at the end of the day. I know it was that way for me.
Aligning yourself with your true purpose and passion in life is life deciding to go with the flow of the Universe instead of against it.
And you become rejuvenated by your work instead of drained.
If you want to discover your true passion and purpose, so that you can live with your heart engaged in your work, subscribe to my email list, and I will send you a free ebook called “How to Define Your True Purpose and Passion in Life.”
It has helped lots of other people discover their true purpose, and it can help you.