What do freedom and independence really mean?
Thursday, July 5th, 2007As we gather to celebrate Independence Day here in the United States, I meditate upon the real meanings of ‘freedom’ and ‘independence’—two words that we cherish in our society. In fact, we are now fighting a war so that we can bring ‘freedom’ and ‘independence’ to the lands upon which we fight.
But are we really free? Are we really independent? And what does all of this have to do with success in life?
Let’s talk about freedom for a moment. In some ways, we have so many choices here in America. A trip to a local Wal-Mart can overwhelm us with the amount of choices we have. But is freedom simply having the choice between Coke or Pepsi? What about the choices that we have made for our lives? Are we really free?
Most people I know are not living the life they would live if they were free of all obligations. Are you? I know I’m not. A great percentage of my life is by design (because I’ve worked really hard at it for years), but I’m still not completely free to do what I want with my days. A quick glance at the other faces in the elevator as I go up to my office in the morning shows me that most of those people don’t consider themselves free either.
And what about our choices again? Are they really ours? I hope that you have seen the previous posts I made on this topic. If not, you should definitely take a look. They show us just how easily our desires and perceptions are manipulated by others so that we think we are making our on choices when we are not. Check these powerful posts out here. And here. And here. And here.
I hope you really watched those videos, because you will then have new ideas about how free we really are.
To me, ‘freedom’ means freedom from all of the conditioning that controls my thoughts and actions on a daily basis. But, in order to overcome our conditioning, we must first recognize it, and know it’s there. And this first step is very difficult. It requires a tremendous amount of courage, honesty and humility. It’s difficult to think that our behavior and choices that we have made in life thus far may not be our own.
So, the first step towards freedom is acknowledging that we may not be free now. And if we are not free, we are definitely not independent.
Let me explain through an example that I am beginning to understand in my life. Like many children, I grew up insecure and needing a lot of attention. I craved approval from my parents, who split up when I was young. I learned that performing well in school allowed me to get the type of attention and approval I wanted, so that’s what I did. The problem was that that habit of “performing well” to get attention and approval translated into lots of different activities as I got older. I subconsciously tied acceptance to performance—and thought if I just kept performing well then I’d get everybody’s respect and approval.
This is a really common belief in this world. How many people end up getting “status symbols” like fancy watches, cars, homes, trophy spouses, etc. just to show the world how well they are “performing”, hoping to gain the respect and admiration of others? This is so pervasive that Dale Carnegie suggests that the best way to influence another person is to make him or her feel important—that is, show them your approval.
The problem is, that seeking the approval of others makes one entirely dependent on them. In fact, one cannot be truly independent until one stops seeking the approval of others, and learns to do things whether or not other people approve of their actions. That is true independence.
So, when you think about your own freedom and independence, don’t look for the government or our leadership to give these things to you. Frankly, how can your independence depend on the government?
Freedom and independence come from inside.
Study yourself honestly and with courage to discover where you may be less free and more dependent than is apparent at first, like my “performance” example above.
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